Houston, we have a stalker

“Love Shack” is a great party song, but I never imagined that it referred to the International Space Station. However, an astronaut has been arrested in a “love kidnap plot”.

A US astronaut has been charged with trying to kidnap a woman she thought was a rival for the affection of a space shuttle pilot.
Navy Capt Lisa Nowak, 43, who flew to the international space station last July, was charged with attempted kidnapping, battery and other crimes.

She drove from Texas to Florida to confront Colleen Shipman, disguised in a wig and trench coat.

Police say Nowak drove from Houston to Orlando wearing a diaper to avoid bathroom breaks.

Ms Nowak, who was denied bail, used pepper spray on Ms Shipman.

The man in the love triangle was said to be Navy Cmdr William Oefelein, who was a pilot on the Discovery’s mission to the space station in December.

Wig? Diaper? Pepper spray? What, did the pure oxygen atmosphere lead to astroerotic fantasies? I’m sorry, but in orbit, the term “fatal attraction” should refer to the earth’s gravitational pull, not to lust for the guy in the pilot’s seat.

I’m a big fan of spaceflight. I think it’s heroic. When I hear the names Shepard, Glenn, Armstrong, Lovell and Ride, I can get choked up. So hearing about NASA’s space-case really irks me. Bizarre and sad as the story may be, it gives a black eye to a worthy and dangerous endeavor. And it puts me in the mood for mockery.

Last year, down here on earth, some male race drivers groused that Danica Patrick shouldn’t drive Indy cars because women can’t handle speed. I simply laughed. Go on, I thought; brag about turning left at 220 mph. That week Eileen Collins was commanding the space shuttle, flying overhead at 17,000 mph. When you’re an astronaut, that’s how it should be done. It’s known as kissing the boys goodbye.