lying for a living

Unwords.com.

Invented words, for hard-to-express ideas. Examples:

Sarchasm. (sär’kăz’əm) (n.) The abyss between the creator of witticisms and the intended recipient who does not find the humor in it.

Sassitude. (săs’i-tüd) (n.) A position of the body or manner of carrying oneself in a fashion suggestive of arrogance; cockiness; superiority.

(Thanks to Dan for the link.)

UPDATE: If you have unwords, post them in the comments.

For typeface addicts, word nuts, and trivia obsessives.

The Rather Difficult Font Game.

In my post about Guns, kidnapping, and a beauty queen, I quoted this sentence from the Guardian:

A law school student and former beauty queen who has posed for a racy calendar while brandishing a weapon has been accused of kidnapping, biting and threatening a former boyfriend with a handgun.

And I noted, “Would it be possible to cram a more bizarre collection of words into one sentence?”

In the comments, thymebandit writes:

Is that a challenge? Sounds like a good competition to get the year off to a good start.

You’re on.

Send in the most bizarre sentences you can find in a news story, or the most bizarre sentences you can write. Cram them full of good crimey weirdness. Bonus points for sentences that mention awful celebrities (Tonya Harding, Paris Hilton’s monkey, etc.) and for making me laugh.

Drop these terms from your vocabulary: “Perfect storm” of cliches make bad English list.

CHICAGO (Reuters) - A “surge” of overused words and phrases formed a “perfect storm” of “post-9/11″ cliches in 2007, according to a U.S. university’s annual list of words and phrases that deserve to be banned.

Awful phrases on the list include “wordsmithing” - used in place of writing - and “the absurd comparisons commonly phrased ‘x is the new y,’ as in ‘(age) 70 is the new 50′ or ‘chocolate is the new sex.’ ‘Fallacy is the new truth,’ commented one contributor.”

Why stop with the list? What words and phrases would you like to see driven from use? I’d start with “proactive.”

Without fanfare, Jeff takes the Verb Names game in a new direction:

Putin

Anybody want to add to that?

From banned names to band names… it’s a rock’n'roll weekend, so here’s a question. How many bands have names relating to crime or the law?

Start by guessing the name of the band I’m going to see in concert tonight.

Okay, here are the androgynous names we’ve come up with. It’s a gender bending world out there.

Aaron/Erin, Abbie, Addison, Ainsley, Andy/Andi, Alex, Allison, Andrea, Andre(e), Ariel, Ashley, Aubrey

Billie, Bobby

Cameron, Campbell, Carmen, Carson, Cary/Kerry, Casey, Chris, Clare, Cy

Dale, Darrel/Darryl, Dana, Darrin, Don/Dawn, Diamond, Dylan

Evan

Fern, Francis/Frances, Fran, Frankie

Gale, Gene/Jean (or of course, the French Jean), Georgie, Gerry

Hayden, Hilary

Jackie, Jamie, Jan, Jayne, Jesse/Jessie, Jo/Joe, Jordan, Jude, Jules

Kelly, Kerry/Carrie, Kendall, Kim, Kit

Lane, Lauren/Lorne, Laurie, Lee/Leigh, Leslie, Lindsey, Logan, Lou, Lynn (Swann - Steelers’ receiver)

Mackenzie, March, Maria (as in Jesus Maria Joseph), Marion, Martie/Marty, Mel (Melissa or Melvin), Meredith, Michael, Micah, Michelle/Michel, Mo, Morgan

Nat (Natalie/Nathan/Nathaniel), Nikki/Nicky, Noel

Paris, Parker, Pat, Perry, Peyton

Quentin (Compson – from The Sound and The Fury), Quinn

Rene(e), Robin/Robyn

Sam, Sandy, Sasha, Sean/Shawn/Shaun/Sian, Shannon, Shirley, Stacy, St. Clair (pronounced Sinclair), Stevie

Taylor, Terry, Tony/Toni, Tracy

Vic (Victoria/Victor)

Any others?

Further to my post about crackpot celebrity baby monikers, The Times looks at the trend for parents to “brand” babies via their names.

Professor Albert Mehrabian is pondering the name Princess Tiáamii over the phone from his office in California. “I don’t mean to be negative but this is a stupid name,” he says.

The article gets even better from there.

I pay attention to names. I keep a baby names book on my bookshelf, because I have to christen a whole batch of people every time I write a book. But I wouldn’t stick somebody with one of these newly popular names, even on the page:

Trinity, Musetta, Cecily, Eudora, Myrtle, Delaney, Romy or Lark – names of the medium, if not necessarily the long-term, future.

Oh, wait - I did! But only as a last name.

And here’s proof that clairvoyants, astrologers, and women who cast chicken bones to tell the future will never run out of suckers customers: parents can now hire a “professional nameologist” to label their offspring.

Abigail will not do what she is told without a good reason and she will not be the type to come home and settle to her homework. She will be fun, but she will also be inclined to perform her own domestic dramas.

Is she saying I shouldn’t have named my kids Lion, Iscariot and Rebellia Lilac?

Just kidding. I would never subject my own children to such bland choices.

And for anybody unfamiliar with Princess Tiáamii’s parents, here’s a photo. (Warning: before viewing, set aside pens, chopsticks, anything that you might use to stab out your eyes.)

UPDATE: Commenters turn this into the “androgynous names” game!

Topped by the newest, Princess Tiaamii.

Gushes her mom - topless glamour model Jordan: “We love it because it’s unique, plus it means something special to us. I’m going to get a tattoo on the back of my neck with a crown and ‘Princess’ underneath.”

Glad to hear about the tattoo. It means from now on, Jordan will be more heavily dressed than usual.

Some standouts from the list:

Diezel Ky: Toni Braxton and Keri Lewis (also parents to Denim Cole)

Kal-El Coppola: Nicholas Cage (Kal-El is Superman’s original birth name)

And, in keeping with the royal theme:

Jermajesty: Jermaine Jackson and Alejandra Genevieve Oaziaza (previously married to Jermaine’s brother Randy)

Though I like this rocker’s choice:

Calico: Alice and Sheryl Cooper (also parents to Sonora Rose)

But here’s the big question…are any of these celebrity picks verb names?

What do the words “facetious” and “abstemious” have in common?

(via Wordsmith)