Today in stuffed shorts: lobsters

The epidemic of trouser-stuffing by thieves enters a snappy crustacean phase.

Shopper arrested with live lobsters in shorts.

A man in southern Mississippi is accused of trying to walk out of a D’Iberville grocery store without paying for food items he’d stuffed into his cargo shorts including live lobsters.

Police Chief Wayne Payne says 35-year-old Nathan Mark Hardy was arrested Saturday after allegedly being caught stuffing food into his cargo shorts — two bags of jumbo shrimp, a pork loin and two live lobsters.

Payne says Hardy, of Biloxi, tried to escape by throwing the pork loin at employees at the local Winn Dixie but fell while running away.

Pants lobsters. The codpiece of choice for the modern felon.

(Via Bill Crider.)

7 responses to “Today in stuffed shorts: lobsters

  1. I’m guessing he thinks he’s a snappy dresser? Or does he only dress this way in a pinch?

  2. Well, at least he didn’t have crabs . . .

  3. You see, it had to do with this claws in his contract…

  4. I think stealing shrimp and lobster is a very shellfish thing to do. And, hiding a pork loin in your loins seems… well… not kosher.

  5. This must be a man thing.

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