30-ought Grampa

“Going out with a bang”:

Alabama company turns gun lovers’ ashes into ammunition.

Two Alabama game wardens have devised a smoking send-off for avid hunters and gun enthusiasts: For a small fee, the pair will turn cremated ashes into ammunition that the deceased’s loved ones can fire at will.

“Costs start at $850.”

How dull. For my sendoff, I want Chuck Yeager to fly to the edge of space in an F-104 fighter to scatter my ashes into the sunrise like so much glittering confetti, while the Broadway cast of Hair sings “Good Morning, Starshine” and the U.S. Men’s Olympic Swim Team performs a water ballet commemorating my life, before drowning themselves in grief.

You know — something dignified.

5 responses to “30-ought Grampa

  1. Sounds like a very solemn and dignified event indeed, Meg. Except for fishing the corpses out of the swimming pool part, I mean…

    Weren’t Hunter S. Thompson’s ashes fired from a cannon? I would’ve expected no less…

  2. Wow, what an awesome send off. And it’s so good I would be ashamed to steal the idea for myself. Not that it would necessarily stop me…. ;>)

  3. “It’s about celebrating life”?
    Going out and killing something with this ammo is death the way I see it.

  4. Were the swim team naked? The people have a Right To Know.

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