December delights: world’s worst album covers

Tonight I will have nightmares. They will feature farm animals and plaid-clad church folk. And an accordian soundtrack.

The Worst Album Covers Ever Created?

Note that the cover above is from an inspirational album. Also beware that several of the covers feature topless people, that not all of these people are women, and that some of them are expansively hairy.

9 responses to “December delights: world’s worst album covers

  1. One of the albums (Heino! – Isn’t that what Hank Kingsley used to say?) says on the side: Ein Geschenk furs ganze Jahr . . . A present for the entire year. Yeah. More likely, for all of these, Ein Albtraum (nightmare) fur Leben (life). [Sorry, I don’t know how to create html umlauts – or should that be htm-lauts?] And now? Therapy.

  2. Try Alt-u and then type u.

    As for Heino, just the sight of the wall-eyed blond bringing red roses for “Dear Mother” is enough to send me shrieking out of the room.

  3. Um, and what’s wrong with accordians?

  4. Okay, okay, they’re pretty gruesome.

    Some of them are deliberately trying for horribleness. But the ones aiming for sincerity and crashlanding (Julie’s 16th birthday — oh my gosh**) are the best. Or worst.

    And some are just being themselves, while falling victim to fashion (especially those fashions that fell into the mimeograph machine.)

    And some, well, they’re just people having fun. I especially like the naked accordian player and the guy with the elephant band.

    ** I’d use a ! here, but I’m overdrawn to about 2014, thanks to Patti’s publication.

  5. Oh I really needed these this morning, hahahahaha… thanks, Meg–best morning belly laugh ev-ah!

  6. Oh my lordy, that was funny stuff. I have so much to say, but all of it is inappropriate so I will tell you, I actually laughed out loud with the Wayne Newton cover. I’d love to hear Wayne’s thoughts on that choice.

  7. Did you notice the song on the album with the, um, busty lady and her cat? “She Sits Among the Cabbages and Peas.” I know that’s dirty, but my imagination fails.

    I think the guitar and accordion couple are kinda sweet–especially coming right after ManOWar.

  8. So wrong in so many ways! It’s the hairdos, and the outfits, but, as you say, Meg, the one about Mutter is blood-chilling! And it’s no wonder the Jacksons never mentioned sister Millie!

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