This is the world that we live in.
First, a Porta-potty bomber is on the loose in Issaquah, Washington. The police are reporting “Honey Buckets damaged by pipe bombs.”
I just can’t believe porta-potties are actually called “honey buckets.”
Second: Missing Wake Forest Baptist Monkey Found. My question: How did they determine the monkey isn’t a Methodist?
Third, let’s hope nobody decides to trim their nails with this. Man uses piranha as scissors.
Fourth, Bigfoot now has competition: “Goat man” spotted in mountains of northern Utah.
SALT LAKE CITY (AP) — A man spotted dressed in a goat suit among a herd of wild goats in the mountains of northern Utah has wildlife officials worried he could be in danger as hunting season approaches.
Utah officials think the man may be an “extreme wildlife enthusiast.” They fear “the goat man might be accidentally shot or could be attacked by a real goat.”
The man appeared to be acting like a goat while wearing the crudely made costume, which had fake horns and a cloth mask with cut-out eye holes, Creighton said.
“I thought, ‘What is this guy doing?’ ” Creighton said. “He was actually on his hands and knees. He was climbing over rocks and bushes and pretty rough terrain on a steep hillside.”
Creighton said the man occasionally pulled up his mask, apparently trying to navigate the rocky terrain.
Well, he may dress like a goat, but he’s not a fool.
Finally, where’s that piranha when you need it? “Rafting gone wild” results in river brawl, 12 arrests.
The least they could have done was get the Baptist monkey to help with the full immersions.